Long Time No Blog

Blogging. I've become so addicted to some blogs that my limited time on the computer is now sometimes used viewing and keeping up to date with several of my girlfriend's blogs. Never enough time for my own! Honestly, some people including myself thought both Mark and I were nuts when we had 4 children so close in age and their toddler years were certainly never dull but plug your ears if your children are small...it's harder now than it was when they were smaller!

When they were little, time was limited to home. Except for the necessary trips to the grocery store, doctor, church, etc. and their needs could be met relatively easily. Food, changing of a diaper, rocking them to sleep. Now as they're 5, 7, 9, and 11 my life is spent largly in the car, taking them to their different actitivies. I have people tell me, "my goodness just cut back on what they're doing" well, it's hard to do when in reality each of them is only doing ONE thing. It's the reality of having 4 children. We're doing homework at two different tables, trying to keep track of who needs papers signed and the dates they're due to be returned on, not to mention the "I could scream" when teachers send home a special request for ___fill in the blank. Won't someone please just figure out what is needed throughout the school year and give me a dollar total? I'd so much rather send in a check than make myself crazy keeping track of it all and then feeling like such an incompetent mother when I forget.

The above things are just silly things to complain about. There are far more serious things on Mark's and my mind now. When the children were younger we weren't worried about their self esteem, their ability to make proper decisions and the countless hours they were away from home during the day soaking in the world's knowledge. I am so overwhelmed at what faces our children right now and pray every day as they leave our house that they'll be surrounded by God's grace and protection.

As for myself, there are days when I hardly have time to catch my breath. When the kids were younger, we'd put them in bed by 7 and have the entire evening to catch up a little bit around the house. There seems to be no catching up anymore. Keeping up with housework, laundry, bills and anything else around the house gets jammed into the small amount of time I'm actually home. I sink into bed at night and just pray for the ability to sleep well and not dream about what lies ahead for the next day.

All this to say, life is full! Not bad, just full. I am thankful for friends who I can call at any time of the day, whether I've seen them the day before or not in years and still feel the freedom to catch up like they're next door. I talked to a girlfriend from college, one of my dearest friends in the entire world, while Mark was gone over spring break with the kids, for 3 HOURS! What a pleasure and a gift to hear her voice. God has blessed me with many of those friends. I take pleasure looking in on the children at night when they've fallen asleep and seeing them so peaceful. It's a wondeful pleasure crawling into bed at night and lying next to a man who I know loves me immensely and is always there to encourage and affirm me.

God is good and even though life can be crazy it's important for me to remember that God is always there. Even when I'm too self absorbed to realize it. He's there to help shoulder the burdens of our world, if we'll only hand them over.